It’s winter. Even in central Virginia, it is winter. I’m looking out my window onto my front yard, and I see…mostly dormant grass with a scattering of autumn leaves. When I move across and look out the window onto my backyard, I see…autumn leaves amidst a smattering of dormant grass. If I was a stranger, a guest of myself as host, who was on his first visit ever to Hacienda de Pathkeeper, I could draw three concurrent conclusions from my observations:

• Most of the trees on my host’s property are in his back yard
• My host has not raked up or blown out the leaves that fell this autumn
• My host is very, very lazy

No, I would not contest the first two conclusions. In fact, I would remark on my guest’s remarkable ability to think critically and analytically, instead. I do contest his third conclusion, however.

You see, I am certain that God gives us autumn leaves for a purpose. Oh, I know that at least one of my two faithful readers will complain that I’ve joined the so-called Christian religious right-wing because I have called upon the Almighty. And, my other faithful reader will moan that I am trying to use the Lord to cover my laziness. But, I remain a card-carrying Lutheranean (which prevents me from being appropriately labeled as a religious right-winger, even in winter) and I point out that leaves belong in the physical rather than the metaphysical world.

What Do the Neighbors Think?

More to the point, what does the Homeowners Association think?

Probably nothing. But, that’s another matter.

One neighbor, whom we’ll call “Jeff,” does not admit to an awareness of my un-raked yard, front or back. On the other hand, I have heard that he’s been busy scheming and talking with others, trying to raise the red flag to the Association. Why? Because I am “different.”

Differences are, or should be, banned by Homeowners Associations. At least, that’s what some believe.

Another of my neighbors—I’ll call him “Richard”—says he’s ready to take on anyone who would work to require me to do that which I am not inclined to do. “Your property is your castle,” Richard declared, “and I’ll fight anyone who thinks otherwise!”

Down the street, John rakes and rakes, even when there’s nothing to rake. On occasion, he mumbles to himself, too.

Alice and Elle are too busy trying to rip out each other’s throats (figuratively, of course) to care much about a bunch of silly leaves. Although, Elle did tell me: “…you’re killing your grass!”

Rocky, the guy many hire to do their yard work, sat with me on my stoop as we drank a beer and asked me why I’m so lazy. But, he thinks this is a good thing, since I’ll (undoubtedly) pay him—later—to do the job.

Leaves Are Good

I have done some homework (on the Web, yes) and, yes, fallen leaves can be a good thing for yards. They:

• Add nutrients to the soil
• Form the best kind of natural mulch
• Help moderate the ground temparture
• Retain moisture

So, I have a strong “case” for letting the leaves lie where they fall in my yard.With all the rain and snow we’ve had, they aren’t migrating to anyone else’s property.

So, I’m committed to my laziness strategy. Feed the lawn, you decaying leaves! I thank them for helping me save money (and the Bay) by fertilizing my yard for me.

Oh, I need to call in Rocky, anyway. After all, I need to get someone to clean the leaves out of my gutters.